I posted on Facebook the other day that we received some good news. I think it's the first time since we started this process that we've gotten off the phone with the nurse feeling happy and at ease. I could see the relief on Brent's face as we both listened intently to the nurse tell us the news over speaker phone. If you didn't see my update, we had (hopefully) one last test taken last Monday, and the results were considered excellent! This was our green light to begin the second round of IUI. Thank you, Lord! So, now I just keep tracking my ovulation and when it happens, I'll go in for an ultrasound & trigger shot.
I have a very small bladder (aren't you so glad you're reading this already?!). When you're tracking ovulation, you're supposed to wait at least 4 hours from the last time you used the restroom to take a test. I usually pee one time per hour. On the box of tests, it says to test once a day, at the same time each day. Well, since I'm an over-achiever and overly-paranoid, I do it three times a day. Morning, noon & night - just to be sure I didn't miss anything.
The box also says not to drink fluids excessively. This proves very difficult for me, because I drink a lot of water throughout the day. It's now day four of testing and I. AM. THIRSTY. I remember going to Six Flags Over Texas once in the summer as a teenager with my sister and some friends, and I remember being so parched I felt like I was dying. All I can tell you is, I'm thirstier than that. In spite of the minimal h2o intake, I'm clearly well hydrated, because after those 4 hours have passed I am almost in a sprint to the restroom. Talk about cruel and unusual punishment! But, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.
Who has two thumbs and likes to be in control? This girl. I keep planning out exactly when ovulation will happen. In my mind, it always occurs at the perfect time when I'm not busy or I don't have many clients booked at work. It happens so that when I call my doctors' office the receptionist says "come on in, we're free right now!". It's safe to say that I'm still learning that my plan is not THE plan. The Bible tells us in Isaiah 45:7 : "I form light and create darkness, I make well-being and create calamity, I am the Lord, who does all these things." The Bible also says to cast your cares upon Him for He cares for you. It seems so simple, yet it's one of the hardest things for me to do. I'm so used to doing everything myself. I'm used to having things the way I want them. I hand over my worries and cares through prayer and petition but I don't always give up complete control. My prayer is that I will.
There are days when I'm hurting so much that I wonder if it can get worse. Then God not-so-subtly reminds me that it sure can.
Our brand new car was recalled and we've been driving a rental. I pitched a fit like total brat when I found out. Why was I even complaining? Yes, it was a big purchase and I wasn't expecting the recall, but we're lucky to have not one but two working vehicles.
I made Brent watch a football game on the TV in his man cave the other night since I was using the living room TV and he said "but it's not HD!"... I laughed and remarked "first world problems, huh babe?". At first it was a joke, but then it sunk into me that it couldn't be truer.
We are SO blessed, and we have more than we need. Every day I see homeless people walking up and down the street in front of the salon and I wonder how they got there. I'll meet people with a sadness in their eyes and wonder what's going on in their lives. I hear about addicts and wonder what drove them to that point. People with cancer or other diseases, fearing for their lives. Everyone has a story. If infertility is our only problem, we're a thousand times better off than most people. I hope that my heart turns away from judgment, but instead has compassion towards those less fortunate, whether it's a few dollars to the needy or a smile that brightens someone's day. My prayer is that people can tell that I'm a Christian when they meet me.
I know you guys already are, but please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers. Round 2 should start in a couple of days and we're very excited! Everyone has been so supportive and we're thankful for every single text, call and Facebook message. I can't wait to write an "I'm Pregnant" blog!!
~Kirsten
"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen."
-- Hebrews 11:1
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