Anyway, we got to the doctors office and I had to go one last time before the appointment began. When I came out of the restroom, Brent was standing at the door holding my purse, and when I looked at him I was overcome with a sense of calmness. I'm not sure why it only took that one look to do it, but I instantly felt better and felt so blessed that I have someone like him to go through this with. I said a little prayer as we walked into Exam Room #4 (which happens to be one of my favorite numbers, maybe another "sign"!). Our doctors name is Rob Sterling and he is AWESOME. Love him, love his nurses, love everything about that place so far. They are encouraging and honest, and stress that while they'll make recommendations throughout this process, Brent and I need to make decisions together that make us happy and comfortable.
Dr. Sterling performed an ultrasound on me to see how close I was to ovulation, and thank the Lord I was close enough to get the ball rolling! I was sent home with a trigger shot to take that evening at 10pm. For those of you who know anything about Brent & needles - it's a terrible mix, so I immediately knew I'd be giving it to myself. As a kid I had to prick my fingers to test my blood, so I figured it'd be a breeze to prick my stomach considering there is plenty more cushion! My sister-in-law offered to come to my house and help me but I assured her that I could handle it. The nurse said I'd feel just a pinch then it would be over. This girl has a low pain tolerance, but the only pinch I felt was when I was removing the needle! Easy peasy. It's amazing to me that a tiny needle and a small amount of medicine goes to work right away at jump-starting my body into ovulation and that in a short 36 hours, potential baby-making begins.
I checked in for my appointment this morning around 9:20. I was praying silently while I waited for the doctor to see me, and in the next exam room over a baby burst into tears and let out the loudest cry. I couldn't help but smile and think "I can't wait until that's MY baby crying like that!"... Later I'll be eating those words willingly ;)
By 10am I was laying on a table while Brent sat next to me being his goofy self to loosen me up. I was dreading the fact I'd have to be hooked up to a catheter, because Google says that's how an IUI is done and of course I believe everything it says. Well, I guess I didn't Google enough because it turns out there are different methods, and there was no catheter for me - *cue hallelujah chorus*. Dr. Sterling said everything went perfectly. As I chilled for about 20 minutes on my back with my hips raised, I silently cheered the little swimmers on as if it were the Olympics and Michael Phelps was racing for his 2,619th gold medal. TMI? Whatev. When you're "trying" naturally to get pregnant, it's more of a guessing game, so I was in quite a Twilight Zone frame of mind knowing that the doctor was placing everything as close as possible to where it needed to be in order to begin a potential pregnancy.
I've always believed that each life is nothing short of a miracle, but wow! To see first hand how intricately EVERY single baby is formed and that the body has to execute every step perfectly in order to conceive is incredible. To think it only takes ONE sperm out of millions. I am completely astounded at Gods plan and handiwork. I am grateful for modern medicine (3 of my 5 nieces and nephews were given to us with some medicinal help!) and the skill & knowledge the doctors have to help couples like us who are struggling with the same issues.
I took the day off work today since I was advised to rest and be as immobile as possible. I didn't argue at all, I mean really, I would've stood on my head all day long if I had to! I've been saying prayers in my head and out loud and claiming our precious baby. I've repeated Psalm 37:4 over and over again and set Philippians 4:4-7 as the background on my phone as a constant reminder.
A friend of a friend shared her story of infertility with me a couple of weeks ago - which by the way, resulted in TWO successful pregnancies - and it's been a huge encouragement! She advised me to do my best to block out anything negative that others are saying, even though most of the time they have the best of intentions and are not meaning to be negative at all, and to just believe that good things are going to happen. To speak it out loud as a proclamation of faith like the Bible says to do. So, that's what I'm doing! I'm holding onto every ounce of hope I have. Today alone my mind has gone a million different directions, but I'm making a conscious effort to stay positive.
As we wait for the results, I ask that you pray for peace for both Brent and myself. Pray that I keep myself stress-free and get plenty of sleep. Pray that Gods will is done, and that His answer for us is a big "YES"! Pray specifically that this method is Gods plan for us so that we won't have to resort to in-vitro, even though of course we're thankful that we have that option still. We love you all and are overwhelmed by the support and love you've shown us.
Consider this an advanced warning - when our baby makes his/her arrival, I will bombard this blog and your Facebook news feed with four thousand pictures of them making the same exact facial expression in each photo just because I CAN! Until next time (which will be soon because I've had another post written for almost a week already, call me an overachiever if you wish!)...
~ Kirsten
"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen."
--Hebrews 11:1
--Hebrews 11:1
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